


Finding The Sun

by GoddessofDawn7843



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Bull with Small Things make me so very happy, Dysfunctional Family, Fluff, Highly Intelligent Stags, Humour, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Inquisitor is slightly crazy, Insomnia, Multi, Overprotective Lavellan is Overprotective, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-16
Updated: 2017-07-16
Packaged: 2018-12-03 03:37:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11523738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoddessofDawn7843/pseuds/GoddessofDawn7843
Summary: Includes one suggestive Qunari, an obnoxious stag, a betting pool, Dorian being Dorian, and plenty of romance, drama and laughter, heartbreak and mayhem in the best possible way. Basically, Dragon Age: Inquisition rewritten with one major addition.





	Finding The Sun

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be breaking up each chapter into three sub- or mini-chapters each according to the events within the game. I've already have most of it planned out, so all that's needed is for me to write it down... and make up my mind regarding the end. It's my first attempt at a full-length story for Dragon Age, but, since there really wasn't another way for me to get the idea out of my head, I figured, why not post it on the internet while I'm at it?  
> Basically, like the (half-ass and sucky) summary I gave says, this is Inquisition rewritten with one big addition. So, yeah! This has probably been done before, but I'm gonna go for it anyway.  
> Enjoy!

**Finding the Sun**

* * *

  _"Exoneration lost his eraser//But my forgiver_ **found the sun** -  
And there are twisted days that I take comfort, '  
Cause I'm not the only one//No, I'm not the only one..."  
\- The Killers, 'I Can't Stay' Lyrics

* * *

**-One-  
** _The Beginning_

* * *

  _She wakes up in chains - stiff from the cold, in a considerable amount of pain, and very much confused as the first thing she sees is a crackle and flash of green light that comes from her own hand._

_Turning her face away, her head snaps up when the door in front of her flies opens with a sudden resounding crash and two women step in._

_It's also when she first notices she's surrounded by armed soldiers with their swords drawn on her._

_She stiffens when she senses one of the woman moving around behind her and leans in next to her ear, demanding that she explain herself - the Temple of Sacred Ashes is destroyed, everyone inside dead-_

_All, except for her._

_She's horrified, more lost than ever, and when the dark haired woman grabs her glowing hand and then yanks at the scruff of her coat roughly, she's speechless._

_She barely reacts until the other woman in the room asks what she remembers. She flounders until she recalls bone-deep fear, running for her life, a strange woman reaching out for her and then nothing at all._

_She knows she doesn't sound nearly as convincing as she should be, and she lets her head and shoulders slump in frustration as the women exchange a look between them._

_The dark-haired woman then kneels down in front of her and takes off the shackles keeping her down when the other leaves._

_As she's pulled up onto her feet, something dawns on her and she asks quietly how long she's been unconscious._

_The woman regards her with an even stare but stiffens when she grips her arm tightly._

_"Please."_

_She's desperate, that much is obvious even to her own ears, and for a fraction of a second, the woman's demeanour thaws._

_"...Three days."_

_Something goes cold inside of her, but before she can dwell on it, the woman turns to leave and she had little choice but to follow after._

* * *

 

Her eyes flew open.

* * *

He looked away from the Breach when he heard a sudden commotion coming from the other side of the camp. Turning around, Solas watched as a crowd of people started gathering around the Survivor's hut.

Walking up next to him, Varric let out a quiet huff in amusement as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Looks like the Herald's up..."

Solas nodded vaguely. "So it would seem..." He said just as a hush fell over the gathering throng and, like one, parted when Lavellan, the newly dubbed 'Herald of Andraste', appeared before them.

Even from where he was standing, the apprehension was obvious on the elven woman's face as she took in the attention directed at her.

Despite it, however, Lavellan lifted her head and levelled her stare, keeping her walk brisk but her pace steady as she then made her way towards the Chantry.

"I wonder if she knows what she's getting herself into...?" Varric wondered out loud.

Solas smiled despite himself. "Do any of us?"

* * *

_He is taken by surprise when his foot slips on the slick, snow-covered path and a slender, yet firm hand suddenly catches him by his upper arm. Looking up, he hesitates when he finds himself face-to-face with the Survivor of the Breach, the Dalish called Ellana Lavellan._

_Steadying him, the elven woman looks him over carefully before sharp green eyes meets and holds his stare._

_For a moment, he imagines she can see right through him._

_She quirks an eyebrow at him curiously, but with a subtle nod of thanks on his part, she lets go without saying a word._

_She then turns her attention up ahead, and when she notices Varric having a similar problem, she goes over to his side. Seemingly unaffected by the icy path as she moves with ease and a smooth, if somewhat impatient gait, she catches the dwarf by the wrist just as he loses his footing as well._

_"Careful," she advises in a soft-spoken voice, "it looks like it only gets steeper from here."_

_Varric's nose cringes at this, "Great, just what I wanted to hear." And grumbles, "Why do they even make the ground vertical?" But with as much dignity as he possesses, he allows her to help him up right._

_Lavellan tilts her head slightly, amused now. "And here I thought all_ durgen'len _liked mountains."_

_Varric snorts, "Yeah, well, you must not have met a whole lot of us, then."_

_She smiles. "You don't get many dwarves in the heart of the forest, no."_

_Before anything else could be said, Cassandra's voice calls out, barking at them to hurry up._

_Lavellan gives Varric one last nod before turning and continuing up the path where the Seeker was waiting for them impatiently, eventually even overtaking her entirely due to her lighter steps._

_Luckily, none of them had to struggle much further as, soon enough, they arrive at the wooden platform with a ladder leading up to the mining complex._

_Taking the lead once more, Lavellan is up the first ladder without a moment's delay when everyone finally catches up._

_By the time he reaches the platform before last, he looks up to see her already standing on top._

_Eyebrows knit together in worry, she pales when she looks out over the valley below - after a moment, her lips start to move as she says something under her breath he can't make out. Swallowing thickly, the elven woman eventually snaps out of her semi-daze and looks down straight at him, probably feeling his eyes on her._

_Then, "Something wrong?"_

_He turns his head just as Varric walks up to him. He doesn't immediately respond and looks up just as Lavellan turns away._

_After a moment's pause, "No... nothing at all."_

* * *

The dwarf laughed. "Probably not, but it's good that you're looking at the brighter side of things, Chuckles." He said dryly, making the elf roll his eyes. "Anyway... out of a matter of interest and all that, what do you think of her?"

It was a curious question, one which he hadn't really thought about. Not really, anyway.

Solas looked at the dwarf out of the corner of his eye. "Why do you ask?"

Varric shrugged. "Just curious."

If there was more to it, the mage chose not to comment on it.

"Until I've seen anything to win or shake my confidence, I have no opinion." He answered carefully.

"It's probably better that way." Varric agreed with a nod.

"What of you?" he asked.

Varric shrugged. "Me? I dunno. I guess the only thing any of us _can_ do is sit and watch what happens next. Either way, I got a feeling shit's just going to get weirder around here."

Solas looked up just in time to see Lavellan disappear into the Chantry.

Weirder indeed.

* * *

Cassandra's heart was thundering in her ears as she stared down the bewildered Chancellor in front of her, daring him with her eyes to challenge what she had just done.

The Inquisition had been declared officially and one way or another, they would close the Breach and find those responsible, with or without anyone's approval.

Roderick opened his mouth but shut it again just as quickly. His mouth drew into a painfully thin line as he stepped back from the Seeker and turned on his heels, shooting Lavellan a final angry glare before leaving.

When he was gone, Leliana sighed softly before sparing the heavy, leather-bound book on the table a weary look.

"This is the Divine's directive: rebuild the Inquisition of old, find those who would stand against the chaos." Then, looking directly at Cassandra. "We aren't ready. We have no leader, no numbers, and now, no Chantry support."

"But we have no choice," Cassandra said and turned towards Lavellan. "We must act now, with you by our side."

The elven woman gauged her reaction before answering, "I admit... I didn't expect this when I woke up." She said quietly.

Leliana offered a weak smile. "Neither did we."

Cassandra turned towards the elven woman more fully. "Help us close the Breach," she asked and extended her hand.

Lavellan regarded the her warily, no doubt, Cassandra thought, thinking back on the less-than-gentle treatment earlier.

For a moment, she thought she would refuse, until-

"I want to help you, Lady Cassandra," she began slowly, looking straight into her eyes, "And after everything I've seen, I have every intention of doing so... But before I agree to anything, I have one condition."

Both Spymaster and Seeker looked between one another for a moment.

Leliana spoke first, "And what would that be?" she asked, arching a brow.

Neither of them expected what came out of the Herald's mouth next.

"Find my daughter."

* * *

There had been little to no activity coming from the Chantry, and as time wore on, most of the curious onlookers had either returned to their duties or still lingered nearby awaiting any news.

As part of the latter group, Solas and Varric stood around the dwarf's usual spot by his campfire, occasionally making small talk but, for the most part, keeping to themselves.

Just when this started to get overrated -and just as Varric was about to suggest they move things to the tavern- both of them looked up when they saw one of Leliana's agents running up the stone steps and made his way towards the Chantry.

Meeting each other's eyes briefly, both of them turned and watched as the agent entered the building, shutting the doors behind him.

Barely two minutes later, however, the same doors flew open and Lavellan stepped out.

With a fierce look of single-minded determination on her face, the elven woman ignored the attention she attracted to herself and ran down the path towards the main gate.

She barely even noticed when she passed them by, while Cassandra was barely keeping up as she trailed afterwards.

"Where's the fire this time?" the dwarf asked incredulously.

Instead of answering him out loud, the Seeker made an impatient noise and gestured at them to follow her before she started down the stone steps herself.

Confused and bewildered but faced with little choice, Varric and Solas followed them outside.

They found Lavellan standing in the middle of the road, looking around herself frantically, until-

" _Mama_...!"

Her breath left her in a sharp gasp before her head shot up and snapped to the direction of a child's voice.

Following her line of sight, they saw three figures - an elven Inquisition scout, a redheaded Dalish woman with a shield on her back, and a small, fair-haired girl between them - coming up the road.

"Mama!" the girl shouted again, breaking away from the other two elves before running toward the Herald.

The change to Lavellan's demeanour was breathtaking, and much like the sun breaking through storm clouds, the second she laid eyes on the child, her entire face lit up.

Meeting her halfway, she sunk to her knees and opened her arms just in time to catch the little elf as she threw herself bodily into her embrace.

Stunned by the display, Varric blinked several times before looking at the others. "Right... By the show of hands, who saw that one coming?"

* * *

**-Two-**  
_Kestrel  
_

* * *

Cassandra, Varric and Solas stood some way apart watching Lavellan as she and her clansman spoke in hushed voices while her daughter, standing next to her, looked between the older women curiously.

"So, let me get this straight..." Varric began slowly, looking at the Seeker, "She has a kid?"

Cassandra, with a deadpan expression, "The evidence would suggest that much."

The dwarf frowned. "Hey, I'm just trying to get my facts straight here." He huffed before giving her a significant look. "Next question: did you know about it?"

"I... No." She said. "The past few days have been so chaotic, and beyond the basics, we did not have time to do a full background check."

"And the Nightingale?" he asked, sceptical now. "I'm having a real hard time believing none of her people picked up on something."

"Leliana doesn't know everything, Varric." Cassandra said dryly.

" _Yet_."

Her lips quirked. "Regardless... from her reaction earlier, I don't _think_ she knew. She seemed as surprised as I was when the Herald told us about her daughter."

Varric didn't seem convinced but let the matter drop for the moment when he turned back to look at the elves and hummed thoughtfully.

"...Do you think she's staying?" he asked quietly.

"I should think so," she said, somewhat ruefully, "it was after all, the condition of her helping us."

Solas raised an eyebrow. "How so?"

"She threatened to turn herself over to the Chantry otherwise."

Varric blinked at her. "You're joking."

Cassandra actually smiled this time. "She was quite adamant about it."

"Would that have worked?" Solas asked. "You do not strike me as the sort of woman who would respond to threats, Seeker."

"I'm not." She agreed. "...But we needed her cooperation, we still do... and as it is, it would not be right keeping a mother from her child."

Varric snorted in amusement. "Well, she definitely gets points if she has enough balls to stand up to you and Leliana, that's for damn sure."

"But is it wise?" Solas pressed. "So much is still uncertain, and a military camp is hardly the place for a child."

"If you can even call what we have now that..." Varric muttered.

Cassandra ignored the dwarf. "I know." She said quietly and looked up just as the two Dalish women embraced. "But for now, we'll have to see what the Herald decides."

* * *

She let out a sigh as she sagged against her clansman, taking comfort in her embrace as her arms came around her shoulders, drawing her closer. When they eventually broke apart, Lavellan felt her throat constrict when she felt her touch her cheek.

Millandrea smiled at the younger woman fondly. "What have you gotten yourself into this time, you wonderfully wayward girl?"

Lavellan managed a soft laugh. "Would you believe me if I said I fell into this?" she said, pressing her cheek against her palm.

"Were you _anyone_ else, not at all." The older woman said quietly before something in her expression turned sombre and her greying eyebrows knitted together. "...Is there really no way you can't just leave all of this behind?"

"I can't. They need me here, Milla."

"So you say..." she said and then, more seriously. "Lana, I know what you told me, but if they're forcing you into anything-"

Lavellan removed her hand from her face. "It may have started that way, but now..." she began. "I may not be sure what this... Inquisition is, exactly, but there are good people here, and I really do think they're trying to help."

"And you?" Millandrea asked. "What do _you_ want?"

"They asked me to stay."

"That's not what I asked."

"I _want_ to help." She said. "Apparently, I'm the only one who can do anything about that big hole in the sky - crazy as it seems. And if I really can do anything about it, shouldn't I try?"

Millandrea sighed softly. "The humans have no idea how lucky they are."

"This affects all of us, not just our people." She reminded her gently.

"True enough..." she allowed with a smile. "Your mother would be so _proud_ of you."

"I hope so... You'll tell Deshanna what happened? And Da? So they don't worry?"

"Oh, they're definitely going to worry, but I'll try my best to explain all this. As for your brother... well, it may take some convincing to keep him from coming down here himself."

"Mahanon will understand."

"He might, but he won't like it." She said before taking her marked hand and held it up to examine. "Before I go, I have to ask - the mark on your hand, is that...?"

The younger woman nodded. "It is."

"I've heard... talk, but, I have to say, I'm still not sure what it is."

"Neither am I."

Millandrea gave her a careful look. "And you don't know where it came from?"

"No, but it can close rifts, and if we're lucky, it'll close the Breach too."

"Does it... hurt?"

"Not anymore." She assured, squeezing her hand.

"Then I'll take your word for it." She said before sparing the little elf at her side a quick look. "...What of your little bird? Have you thought about our discussion earlier?"

When she heard her daughter inhale sharply and clutched at the back of her coat, something in Lavellan's eyes cooled and hardened.

"No."

Millandrea frowned. "Ellana-"

"She stays with me. End of story." She said stubbornly.

"It's not safe here."

"And if I fail, it won't be safe anywhere. And even if that wasn't the case, she is not going back without me... you know why."

The older woman sighed heavily, wearily. "It's been six months."

"But it still happened."

"You can't change the past, _da'len_..."

Her jaw clenched. "I _know_." And then, less tersely. "...But things have been tense, and maybe a little more distance between myself and the Clan will do us all some good."

"Lana, no..."

"It's the truth." Lavellan said and softly, sadly, "...It'll be better for everyone this way."

"Stubborn girl... it's not, but if you feel you need to do this, I understand." Millandrea said as she embraced her again fiercely. "Will you write at least?"

Lavellan swallowed thickly and hugged her back. "Enough to fill a dozen of Kale's books."

Her clansman kissed her forehead. "Creators guide you."

"Creators keep you." She whispered back as Millandrea stepped away.

When the older woman looked at Lavellan's daughter, she knelt down in front of the little elf.

"Aren't you going to say goodbye to me, my love?" she asked, opening her arms in an invitation.

The girl needed little encouragement and when she stepped forward, she wrapped her arms around her neck.

"Do you have to go, Milla?" she asked.

She smiled back sadly. "I'm afraid so. I have to tell the others so they don't worry about you or your mother. But while I'm gone, you'll be good, won't you? Be strong for me?"

The little elf nodded and Millandrea nuzzled her face against hers affectionately before kissing both her cheeks and stood up. "Look after each other..." she said and she turned and left.

* * *

As she approached them, the redheaded Dalish paused when she passed Cassandra.

"Just so know," she said, giving the Seeker a significant look, "if anything happens to either of them, I will hold you and your organization personally responsible."

Cassandra's mouth thinned but nodded stiffly. "Understood."

The Dalish woman's grey eyes narrowed as she looked her over with scrutiny for several moments. After that, her demeanour softened before she looked over her shoulder once more and waved at the Herald and her daughter.

Once she left, Lavellan came over to them.

"Don't mind her," she said wryly, "she's just like that."

Cassandra turned to her. "Did you hear-"

She smiled, amused now. "No, but the woman's frightened off enough boys over my lifetime, so I know the look."

Varric looked at her curiously. "Was that your mother?"

Lavellan shrugged before kneeling down and picked up her daughter. "She's the closest thing I have to one." She said and left it there.

When all eyes turned to the little elf on her hip, the girl's cheeks flushed as she then gripped the lapel of her mother's coat and hid her face against her shoulder.

Noticing this, Lavellan chuckled and smiled at her tenderly. "Pup..." she cooed.

A pair of green eyes like her own peeked up at her, her grip on her coat tightening.

"Now don't hide your face, love. There are people I want you to meet."

A small dent appeared between her brows as she frowned at her.

Lavellan ducked her head to kiss the line there before her eyes lit up and she started peppering kisses all over her face.

A bubbly giggle escaped the girl before she could help it as she turned her head and had to crank her neck to escape the onslaught.

Pulling back, the elven woman grinned triumphantly.

"There you are..." She said, tucking a stray blonde curl behind her ear before looking at the others apologetically. "You'll have to excuse her, she's terribly shy around new people."

Cassandra couldn't quite keep herself from smiling. "No, it... that's alright."

Lavellan nodded. "That's good to hear. But in any case, I should introduce you. This is my daughter, Kestrel."

Solas seemed surprised when he heard the name while Cassandra nodded and Varric smiled.

"Pup," she went on, looking back at her daughter. "I'd like you to meet Lady Cassandra. She's in charge around here, so on your best behaviour, okay?"

When she looked at the Seeker, the pink on Kestrel's cheeks darkened and she turned her eyes down.

"Now don't tell me you've lost your voice." Lavellan said dryly and looked at Cassandra in amusement. "She must think you're pretty."

The little elf's head snapped up abruptly and was blushing up to the tip of her ears at that point. "Mama-!"

Lavellan's grin turned downright impish. "Ah! So you _can_ still talk." She teased.

At the sight of the sullen look on the girl's face, Varric chuckled and stepped forward. "Trust me, as someone speaking out of experience, you'll see past that soon enough." He said, making Cassandra roll her eyes at him. "The name's Varric. It's nice to meet you."

Kestrel blinked at him before smiling shyly. "H-hullo."

Varric flashed her his most charming smile back. "Anyway, I'm glad you're here - it's good to finally have someone around here shorter than I am."

It took a moment, but when she realized what the dwarf had said, Kestrel perked up indignantly.

Lavellan laughed at her expression before she looked at Varric and have him a brief nod in gratitude.

"And this," she said, turning towards the mage in their company, "is Solas - he looked after me when I got this." She said, holding out her hand.

Kestrel looked at her mark and then up at her mother. "Really?"

"He did. Now, love, like Deshanna taught you." She prompted.

The little elf hesitated when she turned towards Solas, clutching at Lavellan's coat a little tighter until she caught the look she gave her.

" _Aneth ara, hahren_." She said softly, not quite meeting the older elf's eyes.

The corners of Solas's lips perked up. " _Andaran atish'an, da'len_." He said smoothly, making the girl blink at him in surprise and then curiosity.

Lavellan beamed at her daughter before she looked at Cassandra.

"...I'm aware we didn't exactly meet under the best circumstances, and I know I'm asking a lot, but if it's all the same to you, my daughter will be staying with me."

Although she said it like she was making a request, there was a subtle edge to it that left no room for argument.

Cassandra picked up on it immediately, and as she looked between the two Lavellans, she eventually relented. Then, quietly, seriously, meeting the elven woman's stare with her own, "I can't guarantee what will happen in the coming days."

Despite the smile on her face, Lavellan's eyes turned sombre. "I know."

"She might not be safe."

"None of us are, but that's why she has me."

"So be it then. Leliana wishes to speak with you later - as you can imagine, there is much that needs to be discussed."

"I suppose there is. At the least I think I owe her an apology for earlier."

"That would be best... I managed to convince her to postpone the meeting."

Lavellan was caught off-guard by this. "I- Are you sure?"

"We both agreed you have other matters that need your attention for the time being."

She blinked at the other woman, until, "...When does she want to see me?"

"Tonight, at the Chantry. You should be introduced to the others as well. They're eager to meet you."

She nodded. "Then I'll be there." She promised, pausing before she turned away. "...Thank you."

When the elves left, Solas turned towards Cassandra. "That was considerate of you."

"But let me guess? Leliana wasn't too happy about it." Varric said wryly.

"She's not, but she understands. It'll take some time to plan our next step in any case," the Seeker admitted. "Until then, I thought it best to allow her that time to get her affairs in order before we proceed."

The dwarf raised an eyebrow. "And what exactly _is_ our next step, Seeker?"

"We'll have to see about that..." she said quietly.

* * *

**[That Night...]**

* * *

Eyeing what was left of the crystalline liquid in the glass vial, Lavellan sighed softly before she added water to the solution within. Once she did, she swished the bottle until the contents mixed together.

She tapped the glass several times, waiting patiently for the potion to settle and clear before she looked over her shoulder at the bed she had woken up on, where her girl was sitting cross-legged.

Smiling at her, she walked over. "C'mon, love," she said, pulling away the covers, "in you get. It's getting late."

Kestrel looked down at her lap, shoulders slumping. "'M not tired..." she grumbled, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand.

Lavellan chuckled and sat down next to her, putting her arm around her shoulders. "Of course you're not." she teased, nuzzling her face against her hair. "But maybe you should lie down anyway? You know, just in case."

"Do I have to go to sleep?"

"We can talk for a bit," she bargained. "But yes - it's been a long day."

Reluctantly, though putting up of a less fuss than she expected, her girl crawled over and got under the covers.

Once she was tucked in, Lavellan handed the vial over to her which Kestrel grudgingly accepted.

"It's the best I can do for now, so small sips. I don't have everything I need to make more right now so we need to make this last for as long as we can." she reminded, watching her carefully as she brought it up to her lips and drank.

When she eventually gave the bottle back to her and lay down, she set it aside for the moment and laid down next to her. Pulling her against her, when she felt her relax, she hummed under her breath, and the two of them passed the time listening to the sounds outside.

"Mama?"

"Mm-hm?"

"When are we going back?"

Lavellan went still for several moments before she answered. "I don't know." She admitted. "It might not be for a while. We have a lot to do here."

"Really? Milla didn't look happy."

"She worries, but she understands why. She was just scared."

Kestrel looked at her disbelievingly. "She gets scared?"

"It's a scary time right now, and Milla and a lot of other people don't know what's going to happen next. That frightens them."

"Are you scared, Mama?" she asked, turning over onto her back to look up at her.

Lavellan smiled at her and nodded. "A little, but it's going to be okay."

"How do you know?"

"I don't, but I hope... and sometimes that's enough." She said and held him closer. "But what about you? Are you worried?"

"A little." She said softly.

"Don't be, I'm not going to let anything happen to you. You know that, right?"

The little elf's brows knitted together.

"Hey," she said, pressing her forehead against hers. "Have I ever lied to you?"

Instead of answering, Kestrel looked away and frowned.

When she caught this, her smile faded, but before she could do or say anything else, there was a sudden, rapt knock against her door. Remembering her promise to Cassandra, Lavellan sighed.

"I have to go," she said quietly, getting up. "Try and go to sleep for me, mm?"

She sat with her until Kestrel's eyes started drooping and Lavellan ducked her head to kiss her forehead.

"I won't be long..." she promised with a whisper, standing up and willed herself not look back when she walked to the door and tried not to dwell on her stare following her out.

* * *

**-Three-  
** _Questions_

* * *

Several days had passed in which a few of several things happened - as far as Varric had heard, they finally had a plan. Since the Herald didn't have enough power to match the magic used to open the Breach in the first place, it was up to either the templars or the mages to make up the difference.

...This would have been all well and good and _far_ too easy, if it wasn't for the tiny, inconvenient detail that neither the mages nor the templars wanted anything to do with them.

But, like it had been explained to him, that was where the other part of the plan came in, hence the reason they were trekking out to the vast stretch of wilderness just outside of Redcliff village, where the fighting was at its worst.

It was all a little convoluted in Varric's good opinion, but he was eager to help out where he could... and if it meant he didn't have to look up at the giant, weird-ass magic hole in the sky for a few days, well, all the better.

They were half a day's journey from the Crossroads where they were supposed to find the Chantry Mother who wanted to help them. It was getting dark, so they decided to set up camp in a secluded area just off the side of the King's Road.

While Cassandra unsaddled the horses, Varric watched as Solas worked to build a campfire. Lavellan had disappeared among the trees with the assurance that she'd come back with dinner.

After some time, and when she still hadn't returned, Varric looked around himself and frowned.

"It's getting pretty late," he admitted out loud, making the elf look at him, "do you think something happened?"

"You're worried?" Solas asked.

"Between demons, the wildlife, the bloody mages and templars, and Maker-knows what else, it's not exactly safe out here, Chuckles." He said, deadpan.

"I'm sure the Herald is capable enough without our assistance, Varric." He said calmly, sitting back on his haunches once he finished stacking the firewood.

Before Varric could respond, he nearly jumped out of his skin when another voice spoke up behind him, "He's right, you know."

Looking over his shoulder, he sees Lavellan walking up to them, a pair of hares in one hand and her bow slung casually over her shoulder.

"Hey," Varric said, actively avoiding looking at the limp little bodies she had with her. "Everything go alright? You were gone for a while."

The elven woman's eyes lit in amusement as she waved off the dwarf's concern. "You don't need to worry about me, Varric, I can take care of myself." She said, putting the hares aside for the moment before shrugging off her bow and placed it with the rest of her things by her pack.

"Worry? Who me?" Varric said, causally playing it off until he noticed the wry curve of her lips and raised eyebrow. "Okay, fine, maybe a little."

"That's sweet of you, but it's unnecessary." She said as she dug out a flat wooden board, taking up the hares again and sat down by the unlit campfire. Lavellan then looked up at Solas, "...Do you need help with that?"

Solas shook his head before sitting back, cross-legged. "No need." He said smoothly and held out his hand in front of him before making a beckoning gesture. In a heartbeat, a small, controlled fire sprang up in the pit and lit the surrounding area.

She grinned. "Show off."

It might have been Varric's active imagination getting the better of him, but he could have sworn he saw the hint of a smirk on the mage's face. But, just as he could dwell on this, Cassandra returned and soon before long, a comfortable silence settled over the four of them.

...Of course, comfortable or not, Varric started feeling fidgety when the quiet dragged on.

He eventually settled for watching what the others were doing... and since Solas and Cassandra was just staring into the fire, he turned to look at Lavellan.

Taking off her gloves and heavier leather jacket, she had the wooden board out in front of her for some reason. When she took out a knife, seemingly from nowhere, he understood her intension when she laid the first hare down on it.

"You may want to look away if you're squeamish," she advised.

As much as Varric wanted not to, he watched with a sick sort of fascination as Lavellan began skinning the hare. This fascination didn't last long, however, and soon gave way to something else entirely when he caught a hint of pink, and instead focused more on the Herald herself.

Admittedly, he would be lying if he said he wasn't just a little curious about the woman. She'd kept to herself whenever she wasn't with her daughter or at the Chantry - she was friendly enough, smart too since she'd trade quips with him whenever they spoke so far, but... aloof, and he'd caught her staring out into the distance deep in thought more than once.

When she turned her unmarked hand just so, he caught sight of something on the skin of her wrist.

Perhaps feeling his eyes on her, Lavellan looked up at him in a silent inquiry until she followed his line of sight. After a moment, she set her knife aside and carefully rolled up her sleeve before holding out her hand and turned it so that her palm was facing up.

Ignoring the blood on her fingers, Varric blinked in surprise. "...Is that a bird?"

"Fereldan cloud chaser," she said before she noticed his blank expression, "It's a type of sparrow."

"...It doesn't look Dalish." The dwarf mused, eyeing the intricate, swirling design and the bright red accents along its dark blue wings and grey body.

She nodded and smiled. "Good eye."

"It might just be me, but I'm sensing there's a story behind it." Varric said, interest piqued.

Lavellan shrugged before pulling her hand back. "I met a merchant who did it for me. I had to trade a dagger and three pelts to get it, but I think it was worth it." She said, tracing the spread wings with her thumb almost wistfully. "...I had it done after Kestrel was born. It... helps keep my girl close."

"It must be hard to leave her behind..."

"I'd be lying if I said I was used to it by now." She agreed quietly, taking up her knife again.

He gauged her expression carefully. "Do you mind if I ask you something?"

"You already did, but I suppose you could ask me something else." She said, her eyes softening when she saw the hesitancy flicker over the dwarf's face. "What is it?"

"Stop me if I'm prying or anything, but I have to know - what's someone like you even doing in a place like this?"

"Someone like me?" she repeated, treading the line between amused and wary.

"It's not every day a beautiful woman finds herself in the middle of a war with a glowing mark on her hand." He said casually, playing it smooth. He heard Cassandra make a scoffing sound at his attempt at smooth talking, and out of the corner of his eye, he caught Solas raising his eyebrow.

As for Lavellan, she was definitely amused now. "Beautiful?"

"Relatively speaking I mean - as far as looks go, you're not horrible disfigured."

While that didn't _quite_ come out as he planned it to, the elven woman surprised him by laughing.

"Oh, Varric, with your charm I'm surprised people aren't throwing themselves at your feet." She said, shaking her head before returning to what she was doing. "But in the future, you're going to have to try something better than that to get anything out of me."

"Good to know." He said, trying not to wince when she promptly stripped the hare's hide off of its body, folding it up neatly before setting it and the carcass aside.

She chuckled under her breath, starting with the second hare. "Alright - by a 'place like this', I take it you mean Haven, yes?"

He nodded. "Like I said, if I'm prying..."

"You're not," she reassured, making a thoughtful humming sound before answering him. "You know that I came here from the Free Marches? Like you can imagine, the fighting was at its worse there. Once it started spilling into the countryside from the cities, it made travelling anywhere... difficult.

"When my Keeper found out about the negotiations, she wanted to know what was happening so she'd have an idea what to do next and where we could go. Millandrea and I volunteered to go and find that out for her... and here I am."

"How'd that work out?" he asked before he could stop himself.

"You tell me. You were there for the fun part."

"If by that you mean 'when shit went sideways', then, yeah, I guess I can fill in the blanks."

"I _could_ say things could be worse, but I'd just be setting myself up for failure." She said wryly.

Varric had to laugh at this and shook his head. "So, just to be clear - you came here out of your free will?" he asked, shooting Cassandra a subtle sideways glance.

She shrugged again. "Pretty much."

"See, when you say it like that, I start to wonder about things... But, uh, what about your daughter? Why did you bring her with you?"

"At the time I volunteered, I didn't know where the Conclave would be held precisely. I thought we'd be gone for a week, two at the most... but, regardless of that, I'd already agreed when Deshanna told me we'd be going South."

"Ah..."

She nodded. "In any case, staying wasn't really an option for me and neither was leaving my daughter."

"Why didn't you want to stay?"

"I had my reasons." She allowed and left it there.

Sensing he may have been close to overstepping the proverbial line, Varric opted to change the subject instead. "Well, hey, for what it's worth, Kestrel looks like she's a real sweet kid."

It worked and some of the residual tension left Lavellan's shoulders. "She is."

"What did your clan say about you guys leaving?"

She let out a delicate snort before smiling ruefully. "It would have been one thing if it was just Millandrea and myself, but Kes is the baby as far as everyone else is concerned. It nearly turned into a fist fight when I told them I was taking her with me."

" _That_ must have been something to see." Varric said, grinning.

"You laugh, but I had to put up with five people yelling at me for two hours straight, and four more still glaring afterwards." She said, rolling her eyes fondly.

"You don't seem too upset about that."

"Why would I be? If they didn't care at all, they wouldn't have bothered to put up a fight in the first place."

"What about your husband? What did he think about the whole thing?"

As soon as the words left his mouth, Lavellan's knife fell out of her hand with a dull _thud_ against the wooden board, her posture going rigid and her face blank.

When she spoke, her voice came out strained, "Teowyn didn't have a say in the matter."

Her answer surprised and confused him, and despite the obvious tension that sudden erupted, it didn't stop him from persisting. "You mean you didn't ask him about it first?"

The muscle in her jaw clenched. "No."

"What? But-"

She cut him off, "You can't ask a dead man for permission, Varric."

It took several heartbeats for her words to hit home, and when it did, all he could do was blink at her.

Shit.

"I-" He began lamely. "I'm sorry."

She didn't meet his eyes as she picked up the knife again. "It's not your fault." She said quietly and finished skinning the hare, ripping its hide off with more force than what was strictly necessary.

Looks passed between them, but after several painfully awkward minutes of silence, the Herald broke it when she sighed and stood up.

"I'm going to wash my hands. There's cooking oil in my bag, and vegetables for a base broth if you'd like to start with that? I'll add these when I come back." She said, gesturing to the carcasses.

Varric got up as well, "Look, Lavellan-"

"Leave it." She said sharply, making him stop in his tracks as she left without another word.

Even without looking at either of them, the dwarf could feel the weight of Solas and Cassandra's stares against the back of his head.

"I know, I know," he grumbled, waving them down, "I talked when I should have shut up. I'm an idiot. I _know_."

"Well spotted, Master Tethras." Solas said sardonically as Cassandra fixed him with a look that dripped with disapproval.

His shoulders slumped as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Shit..."

* * *

**[Several Days Later...]**

* * *

She'd been reading quietly in the Chantry when the commotion started.

Looking up, Kestrel was startled when she saw the two guards stationed by the doors of the War Room rushing past her, towards the double doors.

The shouting from outside grew in volume until it echoed loudly in the stone hall, and the little elf couldn't keep from cringing.

Carefully folding the corner of the page she was busy with, Kestrel blew out the candle at her side and stood up from her spot on the ground. Once she adjusted the worn, woollen scarf around her neck, she picked up her book and held it close to her chest before going to the doors.

Poking her head out, her eyes widened when she saw a dozen or more people standing in front of the building, divided by an invisible line with angry yelling coming from both sides. They seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

Keeping her back to the building, Kestrel made herself as small as possible - luckily, nobody seemed to notice her as she slipped away, unseen.

Once there was some space between herself and the crowd, she started wandering between the wooden huts on the other side of the camp, occasionally stopping to wriggle her toes against the unfamiliar confines of her new boots and made a face whenever he did so.

Not really looking where she was going, the next thing she knew, she stumbled back when she collided against something solid.

Confused, when she raised her head, the first thing she saw was a pair of ragged green leggings and a pair of almost-bare feet. Realizing she was sitting on the ground, she looked up and froze when he saw Solas standing in front of her.

When Solas turned his head, he stared down at the girl in surprise before he frowned.

Swallowing delicately, the little elf shrank under the mage's even stare and looked down, fidgeting with the hem of her sleeves nervously.

Expecting to be yelled at, when nothing of the sort came, Kestrel looked up again and blinked in surprise when the older elf kneeling down and offered her his hand.

Solas, seeing his hesitance, smiled and waited patiently until eventually, tentatively, Kestrel reached up and took it.

Once he helped the girl back up onto her feet, Solas spotted a book lying in the snow.

Leaning over, he picked it up and examined it - the cover was made out of pale dear skin, presumably halla leather, while the mass of pages seemed to have been compiled haphazardly in a single, chaotic heap as several stuck out in places.

It was heavier than he anticipated, and Solas couldn't help but wonder how someone of Kestrel's size even managed to lift it, never mind carry it around with them.

He looked at the little elf in front of him and then looked her over for any obvious signs of injury.

Kestrel looked down at his feet as a feint, pinkish twinge touched her cheeks, biting on her lower lip self-consciously under his scrutiny.

"Are you hurt?" Solas asked.

A pair of bright green eyes looked up at him from under a mass of pale curls, and after a moment, the girl shook her head.

When he noticed Kestrel looking at the book in his hands, he held it out for her to take.

The girl took it eagerly enough, impressively not faltering under the weight. Adjusting it in her thin arms, she held it to his chest before smiling at Solas shyly. "Thank you."

"What are you reading?"

"Huh? Oh..." she hesitated, shuffling her feet, "I-it just a book my Papa Kale gave it to me before we left."

"And who's that _da'len_?" he asked patiently.

"He's Milla's husband," she explained. "He's the master craftsman of my clan, and he tells stories around the fire on some nights. He wrote most of what's in here, but some of the pages are empty, and he said either me or my mama could write in it if we wanted to."

"Have you?"

"You're only supposed to write in it if you _have_ a story." She said matter-of-factly, sounding like she was repeating someone else. "But Mama's written in it a few times since she knows more stories than I do, and I, uh... I don't really know how to write yet, so..." she trailed off, suddenly sheepish.

Solas nodded, "I see."

Kestrel looked like she wanted to say something else, but just as she could, a shout from the mob in front the Chantry echoed and the little elf flinched.

Seeing this, Solas stood up and turned his head, frowning at the near-volatile display.

Then, "Solas...?"

The older elf looked down to see the younger looking back at him with knitted brows and an oddly solemn expression on her face.

"Yes?"

"Why are they fighting?"

Solas counted his words carefully before answering. "In times of crisis, some would turn to blame to hide their fear. They're lashing out because they do not know what else to do."

"Mama said something like that too..." the girl frowned before looking up at the Breach. "...Is it because of that?"

"In part." He allowed.

"It makes the air feels all funny... I don't like it." Kestrel said, crinkling her nose.

"Nor, I think, does anyone." Solas agreed. "But what do you mean? Funny how?"

"I don't know... it feels like it does before a storm - like when there's too much lightning in the clouds, but different. It isn't natural."

Her observation surprised him. "I wouldn't go so far as to call the phenomenon that - small tears _do_ sometimes occur in places where the Veil is thin. But, yes, I suppose nothing about the Breach could be considered 'natural'."

Kestrel turned her head back to him, openly curious now. "You sound like know a lot about this stuff."

Solas smiled despite himself. "I would certainly hope so. I've spend a great deal of time studying and exploring the Fade."

"Really? How do you do that?"

"How does one normally enter the Dream realm?" he asked. "I go to sleep in ancient ruins and sites where I might find memories of past events or communicate with lingering spirits."

"I didn't know you could talk to spirits..." Kestrel admitted.

"Few dare to try."

"Well, when you _do_ talk with them, what do you say to them? Or, no - what do _they_ say?"

"A great deal, some possess knowledge some of the greatest scholars today could only dream of, some inspire courage, and some would seek to give guidance - but that would largely depend on the type of spirit you encounter... and on your own willingness to listen, of course."

Kestrel considered this for a moment. "What kinds of spirits do you get? How many are there?"

"At a time, it would have been impossible to say for sure. However, spirits embody a certain, powerful aspect or virtue found within ourselves, like Love or Justice or Wisdom-" He stopped himself before he got too caught up, noticing how often Kestrel would shift the book in her arm. " _Da'len_ , isn't that heavy?"

The girl blinked at him owlishly. "No."

Solas wasn't wholly convinced but took her word for it.

"And you go into ruins?" Kestrel asked again.

He nodded. "I do, but even if I don't sleep there, whatever remnants I find are still... interesting."

"...It must be sad too." she said, the simplicity and sincerity of the statement taking Solas by surprise.

"I... Yes it is."

The little elf then made a thoughtful humming noise he had heard Lavellan make on occasion. "There was one in the forest we camped in once - a big one with a tower and halla statues and everything. I wasn't allowed to go in, but my uncle did, and he said it was full of spiders... and ghosts." She added as an afterthought and stared up at the sky. "I didn't believe him, but he promised he really did see them. The ghosts I mean - everyone knows giant spiders are real."

Solas found himself actually listening to the girl's rambling, curious about where she was going with it.

When she stopped talking, Kestrel looked back at him. "Are they nice?" she asked suddenly.

"The... spiders?" The mage said slowly.

"No, spirits."

Confused at first how she had connected the one line of thought with the other, Solas could only stare at the girl in front of him.

When he saw the look on the younger's face, the older elf gave in. "Yes, _da'len_ , some of them are very nice." He said, sounding less exasperated than he himself anticipated.

The answer he gave seemed to satisfy her. "Oh, that's good."

Just as anything else could have been said, they heard Lavellan's voice call out Kestrel's name. When both elves turned their heads, they saw the Herald on the path at the bottom of the stone steps, her back turned.

"Over here, Mama!" Kestrel called back.

When she turned around, relief momentarily flashed over Lavellan's face.

"There you are..." she said before starting on the steps. "What are you doing, love?"

"I was talking to Solas, he was telling me about ruins and dreams, and spirits. Did you know you can _talk back_ to them?" the girl gushed.

Lavellan arched her eyebrow wryly. "You don't say..." she said, looking at Solas curiously.

Kestrel nodded earnestly before, hopefully, "Are you done for the day?"

She turned back to her. "Almost - I just need to talk to the others in the Chantry about our trip to Val Royeaux, but after that, perhaps we could go for a walk?"

She agreed eagerly. "...Can I take my shoes off?"

"Why in the world would you want to do that?" she asked.

"Cause they're stuffy, and I have to keep shuffling my toes in them."

"That may be so, but they keep your feet warm and you from getting sick."

"...Solas doesn't wear shoes."

"That's because his mother isn't here to tell him to do otherwise." She said matter-of-factly, causing the mage in question to let out an involuntary amused snort.

She shot him an apologetic look before turning back to her daughter. "Now, off with you. Get your cloak and put the book away, I'll be with you once I'm done - and keep your shoes on!"

Despite the pout, Kestrel was cheerful enough when she said her goodbyes to Solas and ran off.

Solas watched her go until Lavellan spoke up. "She's not going to leave you alone now." When he looked at her questioningly, she shrugged and, simply, "She knows you know things."

"She's certainly very... inquisitive." He remarked dryly.

Lavellan bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from grinning. "All the better we're here, then." She answered evenly. "...I know Kestrel has a tendency to... babble. I'm bias, of course, so I think it's one of her more endearing qualities, but if it disturbs you, I can talk to her."

"No, no not at all," he said, his answer surprising himself. "I suspect she was just trying to get away from the noise in front of the Chantry, and as it is, I appreciated the distraction myself."

The elven woman's expression softened. "Then I'm glad it worked out."

"...She asked about the Breach."

"I suspected she would." She said quietly and sighed. "I take it you told her?"

"I explained to her what it was, yes." He said simply. "...I hope I didn't overstep a boundary in doing so."

She shook her head. "Not at all - and in all honesty, I didn't do a good job of explaining it when she asked me, so..."

"She did?"

"A massive tear in the sky isn't exactly something one can overlook. But, yes, she asked me about a few things and I couldn't quite explain the... finer details about Rifts." She admitted.

Solas nodded. "I see." He said, before, "Perhaps I could lend my assistance in that regard?"

Lavellan raised an eyebrow again, "How so?"

"If you have questions about the Veil, I could try answering them to the best of my ability." He explained.

If she was surprised by this, it was nothing compared to the surprise he felt in himself for suggesting it in the first place.

She didn't answer immediately, but just as he thought about receding the offer, she nodded.

"I'd appreciate it if you could, and I'd be lying if I'd said I wasn't curious about a few things myself."

"At the very least we'll have something to talk about on the road in the next few days." He said diplomatically.

"Then I look forward to it." She said with a smile before clearing her throat delicately. "...I'll let you get back to your work."

He nodded.

When she turned to leave, she paused for a moment. "Oh, but Solas?" she said, looking over her shoulder briefly. "It's not my place, but you should probably look into getting some shoes as well."

With that, she left without another backwards glance, and for some reason, Solas found himself chuckling under his breath.

**-TO BE CONTINUED-**

**Author's Note:**

> My first DA:I fic for this site - I originally posted this on FanFiction.net only to take it down after a while... here's to hoping that won't happen here. Personally, I've always enjoyed writing about families, be they related by blood or otherwise, as well as familiar relationships and friendships like we see them in DA, so I'm curious myself where I could take this.  
> Also, let it be known that I am a diehard Solas/Lavellan fan-girl, so this is my way of curbing my crazy tendencies regarding these two.


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